Another blog book tour, another piece of my puzzle

Posted on | August 9, 2006 | 2 Comments

Something I’ve had a hard time with in my life is accepting the choices I’ve made. Deeply accepting them, in a way that feels true, and safe, and certain. There’s always a period of self-doubt, remorse, doubling back, and sick stomach after big decisions and changes. I don’t know how to just embrace my choices and then let them go. I think way too much.

Reading the book Your Heart Knows The Answer, How to Trust Yourself and Make the Choices That Are Right for You by [tag]Gail Harris[/tag], has given me so much insight into my patterns of fear and self-doubt. I haven’t had time to implement all of the exercises, but I have thought a lot about how tricky it can be to differentiate between the voice in my heart and the voices in my head. How hard it can be to notice the subtle ways in which the [tag]mind[/tag] snares me with my own best intentions, wanting to do the right thing, she throws a million doubting questions at me.

But apparently the [tag]heart[/tag] knows, and it’s just a matter of learning how to listen. So I’m going to keep listening to the dialog that’s going on inside of me about going back to work full-time, putting my kid back in the public school system, putting my other child into daycare, and letting go of my vision of a small, community, organic farm (for now.) I’m going to use this opportunity to connect with what my best self knows is right for me and my family, to hear her clear notes singing softly under the cacophony of doubts and fears always ringing around in my head.

The book has also reminded me of a lot of practices that once made up a daily routine for me, of [tag]meditation[/tag], exercise, breath and [tag]affirmations[/tag]. I’ve strayed far from taking good spiritual care of myself, and I’m glad to be thinking about these things again, especially in terms of living the best life I can live. It couldn’t have come across my desk at a better time, and if you’re looking for some guidance to finding your own within, I recommend this book as a very gentle, kind, loving tour guide to your heart.

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